Kathleen Montgomery-Newton IX - Revision history

Doorbell3200Washcloth0957: 24 revisions imported

2026-04-07T06:54:40Z

24 revisions imported

← Older revision	Revision as of 16:54, 7 April 2026
(No difference)

w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>Fabafaba32 at 01:07, 22 March 2024

2024-03-22T01:07:01Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:07, 22 March 2024
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	"Oh, heavens to betsy..." the G-Man whispered, backing away, trembling and shaking his head, "Twelve... Twelve... Twelve... Twelve... Gods, please, help us all..." Thusly, he vanished into a thin mist.		"Oh, heavens to betsy..." the G-Man whispered, backing away, trembling and shaking his head, "Twelve... Twelve... Twelve... Twelve... Gods, please, help us all..." Thusly, he vanished into a thin mist.

	Poppa Slop		== Poppa Slop ==
			As compensation for her ordeal, Kathleen was appointed Permanent Governess of Arizona until the [[Waifurian Empire]] took control of the region in early 2 AB, at which point she was plugged into a wall and turned into an Air Conditioner.

	[[Category:Characters]]		[[Category:Characters]]

w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>Fabafaba32 at 01:05, 22 March 2024

2024-03-22T01:05:56Z

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	"Hurt her?" the G-Man cocked his head, "Why would Blood Vessel Enhancement... hurt her?"		"Hurt her?" the G-Man cocked his head, "Why would Blood Vessel Enhancement... hurt her?"

			"Yes, asshole," replied Poppa.

			"Oh, heavens to betsy..." the G-Man whispered, backing away, trembling and shaking his head, "Twelve... Twelve... Twelve... Twelve... Gods, please, help us all..." Thusly, he vanished into a thin mist.

	Poppa Slop		Poppa Slop

w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>Fabafaba32 at 01:03, 22 March 2024

2024-03-22T01:03:59Z

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	"Oh, hush, dearie," he said, putting a finger to her lips, "You won't be needing those wires anymore. Why don't you try, instead..." He held up a bundle of cables and clear medical pipes, "These?"		"Oh, hush, dearie," he said, putting a finger to her lips, "You won't be needing those wires anymore. Why don't you try, instead..." He held up a bundle of cables and clear medical pipes, "These?"

			She shook her head furiously, but the Tesla Surgeonbot began the procedure.

			"Arizona eagerly awaits their new Pipe Governess," the G-Man smiled, taking a hit of a catnip joint.

			Something snapped in the back of the room, and the smell of smoke filled the air.

			The G-Man cocked an eyebrow.

			From the darkness emerged Poppa Slop, holding a smoking gun. Through the G-Man's chest had been blown a sizeable bullet hole.

			"Go fuck yourself, suit," Poppa Slop said, extending his claws, and lunging at the G-Man.

			This was an unfortunate decision, as the G-Man was false, and Poppa Slop phased straight through him. Alas, the G-Man was moved by this choice, and had mercy on Poppa Slop.

			"My [[Elon Tusk\|Contractor]] is rather adamant about your daughter's pipeification..." the G-Man sighed, watching the Tesla Surgeonbot affixing plastic cords to Kathleen's orifices, "But I suppose I can settle for... partial pipeification?"

			"Fine! Just let my daughter go!" Wailed Poppa Slop, dropped the gun and pleading with the G-Man, "Please, don't hurt her!"

			"Hurt her?" the G-Man cocked his head, "Why would Blood Vessel Enhancement... hurt her?"

			Poppa Slop


	[[Category:Characters]]		[[Category:Characters]]

w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>Fabafaba32 at 00:56, 22 March 2024

2024-03-22T00:56:04Z

@@ Line 36: / Line 36: @@
 == Poppa Slop's New Friends ==
-Poppa Slop soon acquired a FaceTime call with high-ranking Combine officials.
+Poppa Slop soon acquired, or was made to acquire, a FaceTime call with a [[G-4323|high-ranking Combine official]], who kept his face in shadow throughout the entirety of the call. the individual promised great rewards for Poppa Slop and unrivaled protection and riches, if only Poppa Slop could get one of the Combine's assassins to the White House to "neutralize" the President and perhaps turn the tide of [[The great META war|the Great META War]] back to the Combine's favor. This Poppa Slop said was possible.
 [[Category:Characters]]

w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>Fabafaba32 at 00:48, 22 March 2024

2024-03-22T00:48:26Z

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	== Arizona Drug War ==		== Arizona Drug War ==
	[[Poppa Slop]] was furious. He was furious at the U.S. Government, furious at the Board of Waifuria, and furious at the hairball he'd coughed up that morning. But most of all, he was furious at the [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)\|Mummy]]- that foul, wretched, vile thing, for framing his daughter and soiling her reputation. [[Poppa Slop]], now worth over $329 Billion dollars thanks to highly fruitful marijuana and catnip businesses, began searching for 'business partners' to help him protect his daughter. He interviewed several potential candidates for this position, Wyoming cowboys, Californian Mercenaries, New Mexican assassins. But none of them satisfied Poppa Slop. As a matter of fact, only one entity seemed to have the power, breadth, and influence to protect Governor Kathleen from the United States' advances. And that entity was the Combine Overwatch.		[[Poppa Slop]] was furious. He was furious at the U.S. Government, furious at the Board of Waifuria, and furious at the hairball he'd coughed up that morning. But most of all, he was furious at the [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)\|Mummy]]- that foul, wretched, vile thing, for framing his daughter and soiling her reputation. [[Poppa Slop]], now worth over $329 Billion dollars thanks to highly fruitful marijuana and catnip businesses, began searching for 'business partners' to help him protect his daughter. He interviewed several potential candidates for this position, Wyoming cowboys, Californian Mercenaries, New Mexican assassins. But none of them satisfied Poppa Slop. As a matter of fact, only one entity seemed to have the power, breadth, and influence to protect Governor Kathleen from the United States' advances. And that entity was the [[Combine]] Overwatch.
	Poppa Slop
			== Poppa Slop's New Friends ==
			Poppa Slop soon acquired a FaceTime call with high-ranking Combine officials.
	[[Category:Characters]]		[[Category:Characters]]

w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>Fabafaba32 at 00:47, 22 March 2024

2024-03-22T00:47:22Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 10:47, 22 March 2024
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	== Mummy Displeasures ==		== Mummy Displeasures ==
	Mummy, then [[The Board of Waifuria\|Board of Waifuria]] Chairman, was displeased. [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)\|Mummy]] had quite liked 'Poop' Doug. Him and his rotten associate [[James L. Fuck]] ~~devised~~ a ~~plan~~		Mummy, then [[The Board of Waifuria\|Board of Waifuria]] Chairman, was displeased. [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)\|Mummy]] had quite liked 'Poop' Doug. Him and his rotten associate [[James L. Fuck]] ordered the [[United States of America\|American]] and [[Canada\|Canadian]] intelligence agencies to investigate the massacre at Phoenix. After 36 seconds of investigation, the intelligence agencies unaminously declared that the [[Percibol Cartel]] was responsible for using what was later determined to have been a [[Combine]] [[Jupiter]]-Class Ohio-[[Ohio Greenspill\|Greenspill]] Xenoplasma Ballistic Missile to strike, from space, the Arizona Capitol. The evidence to support this claim was never made publicly available.

			== Federal Indictment ==
			Kathleen was thusly indicted by the United States Federal Government. This marked the first time in history that a sitting state governor was indicted by the Federal Government. This was horrific, and President [[Barack Obamna]] sobbed for 14 hours straight after Kathleens' indictment. The Supreme Court ordered Kathleen turn herself into federal court in Washington or else be extradicted by Navy Seals.

			This was a horrendous threat to make against the daughter of a cartel boss.

			== Arizona Drug War ==
			[[Poppa Slop]] was furious. He was furious at the U.S. Government, furious at the Board of Waifuria, and furious at the hairball he'd coughed up that morning. But most of all, he was furious at the [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)\|Mummy]]- that foul, wretched, vile thing, for framing his daughter and soiling her reputation. [[Poppa Slop]], now worth over $329 Billion dollars thanks to highly fruitful marijuana and catnip businesses, began searching for 'business partners' to help him protect his daughter. He interviewed several potential candidates for this position, Wyoming cowboys, Californian Mercenaries, New Mexican assassins. But none of them satisfied Poppa Slop. As a matter of fact, only one entity seemed to have the power, breadth, and influence to protect Governor Kathleen from the United States' advances. And that entity was the Combine Overwatch.
			Poppa Slop
	[[Category:Characters]]		[[Category:Characters]]

w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>Fabafaba32 at 00:35, 22 March 2024

2024-03-22T00:35:48Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 10:35, 22 March 2024
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	== Mummy Displeasures ==		== Mummy Displeasures ==
	Mummy, then [[The Board of Waifuria\|Board of Waifuria]] Chairman, was displeased. [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)\|Mummy]] had quite liked 'Poop' Doug and ~~had quite~~ a ~~bra~~		Mummy, then [[The Board of Waifuria\|Board of Waifuria]] Chairman, was displeased. [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)\|Mummy]] had quite liked 'Poop' Doug. Him and his rotten associate [[James L. Fuck]] devised a plan
	[[Category:Characters]]		[[Category:Characters]]

w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>Fabafaba32 at 00:34, 22 March 2024

2024-03-22T00:34:39Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 10:34, 22 March 2024
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	[[File:Kathleen.jpg\|thumb\|Kathleen Montgomery-Newton IX]]		[[File:Kathleen.jpg\|thumb\|Kathleen Montgomery-Newton IX]]
	Kathleen Montgomery-Newton IX, nee Bragorp, was a Vietnamese-American Woman and [[Percibol Cartel]] missionary who was the subject of [[Elon Tusk\|Elon Tusk']]<nowiki/>s Pipevein Experiment, which proved rather consequential for the scientific community as well as the rural farming community of [[Brisport Falls, Idaho]].		Kathleen Montgomery-Newton IX, nee Bragorp, was a Vietnamese-American Woman, Arizona politician, and [[Percibol Cartel]] missionary who was the subject of [[Elon Tusk\|Elon Tusk']]<nowiki/>s Pipevein Experiment, which proved rather consequential for the scientific community as well as the rural farming community of [[Brisport Falls, Idaho]].

	=== Earloids & Fatherly Fate ===		=== Earloids & Fatherly Fate ===
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	As 99% of Arizona's elected officials gathered in the Arizona State Capitol, something rotten happened; that being a Combine Missile Strike, expertly timed by G[[General Grievous\|eneral Grievous']] Land-Interception Gradient Missile Airbeam (LIGMA) system. This was horrendous for most of Arizona, but temporarily great for Kathleen. She was the highest ranking politician to survive the attack, and was thusly inaugerated as Governor of Arizona. This was grand. She was the first Vietnamese-American Woman to serve in this office in Arizona.		As 99% of Arizona's elected officials gathered in the Arizona State Capitol, something rotten happened; that being a Combine Missile Strike, expertly timed by G[[General Grievous\|eneral Grievous']] Land-Interception Gradient Missile Airbeam (LIGMA) system. This was horrendous for most of Arizona, but temporarily great for Kathleen. She was the highest ranking politician to survive the attack, and was thusly inaugerated as Governor of Arizona. This was grand. She was the first Vietnamese-American Woman to serve in this office in Arizona.
			[[File:Mummyrotm.jpg\|thumb\|Mummy in his Board of Waifuria Military Uniform. ]]

	== Mummy Displeasures ==		== Mummy Displeasures ==
	Mummy, then Board of Waifuria Chairman was displeased. Mummy had quite liked 'Poop' Doug and had quite a bra		Mummy, then [[The Board of Waifuria\|Board of Waifuria]] Chairman, was displeased. [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)\|Mummy]] had quite liked 'Poop' Doug and had quite a bra
	[[Category:Characters]]		[[Category:Characters]]

w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>Fabafaba32 at 00:29, 22 March 2024

2024-03-22T00:29:46Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 10:29, 22 March 2024
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	Doug Ducey launched a shitty plan to foil Kathleen's political career. He aimed to do something foul and vile; something unimaginably wicked. He held a press conference on the dangers of marijuana use. The entire city council, as well as many state legislators, were mandated to attend. This was an unfortunate choice.		Doug Ducey launched a shitty plan to foil Kathleen's political career. He aimed to do something foul and vile; something unimaginably wicked. He held a press conference on the dangers of marijuana use. The entire city council, as well as many state legislators, were mandated to attend. This was an unfortunate choice.

	As 99% of Arizona's elected officials gathered in the Arizona State Capitol, something rotten happened; that being a Combine Missile Strike, expertly timed by G[[General Grievous\|eneral Grievous']] Land-Interception Gradient Missile Airbeam (LIGMA) system. This was horrendous for most of Arizona, but temporarily great for Kathleen. She was the highest ranking politician to survive the attack, and was thusly inaugerated as Governor of Arizona.		As 99% of Arizona's elected officials gathered in the Arizona State Capitol, something rotten happened; that being a Combine Missile Strike, expertly timed by G[[General Grievous\|eneral Grievous']] Land-Interception Gradient Missile Airbeam (LIGMA) system. This was horrendous for most of Arizona, but temporarily great for Kathleen. She was the highest ranking politician to survive the attack, and was thusly inaugerated as Governor of Arizona. This was grand. She was the first Vietnamese-American Woman to serve in this office in Arizona.

	== Mummy Displeasures ==		== Mummy Displeasures ==
	Mummy, then Board of Waifuria Chairman was displeased. Mummy had quite liked 'Poop' Doug and had quite a bra		Mummy, then Board of Waifuria Chairman was displeased. Mummy had quite liked 'Poop' Doug and had quite a bra
	[[Category:Characters]]		[[Category:Characters]]