Horse MK. 2: Difference between revisions

Horse MK.2
Aliases	Emperor MK.2
Affiliation	Waifurian Empire Farmer Charlies (Shareholder)
Biographical information
Date of birth	03/22/193 B.B.
Place of birth	Columbus, Ohio
Date of death	06/22/100,542 A.B.
Place of death	Temple of Rannjoe
Physical description
Gender	N/A
Height	7'11'
Weight	432 lbs.
Eye color	Solar-powered
Appearances

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Latest revision as of 16:54, 7 April 2026

Horse MK.2

Horse MK.2 was a cybersteed and Emperor of Waifuria. Notably, Horse MK.2 was indirectly partially responsible for the death of Saul Goodman.

Early Childhood

Horse MK.2 was synthesized in an Ohioan weapons lab in 193 B.B., during the Great Meta War. It was created by Dr. Finshersnitch Ozband, who speculated that creating a 'cybersteed' would help the Ohioan armies gain the upper hand against the Combine and American forces.

Sentience

While Ohio gained very little from Dr. Ozband's work, Horse MK.2 gained sentience due to a freak accident where a lab assistant accidentally connected his cerebral cortex to a neurocord and uploaded his conscience to Google Drive. Taking advantage of the situation, Dr. Ozband downloaded the assistant's conscience onto a USB drive and implanted it into Horse MK.2.

Feelings of Remorse

After the settlement of a lawsuit against the Christian Children's Foundation for Cancer research, Horse MK.2 realized that it had taken all of the money from this nonprofit organization. Its lawyers, G-Man and Goodman, reassured it that "their pain would soon be quelled". When Horse MK.2 attempted to return the money, Saul threatened it with a lawsuit for dishonoring the settlement. Horse MK.2 begrudgingly accepted the money, and invested it all into shares of Farmer Charlies stock.

Imperial Reigns

Horse MK.2 served as Emperor of Waifuria twice (see Waifurian Dynasties). It was the only entity to do so twice in the same lifetime. Horse MK.2 made great strides in improving the intergalactic shipping routes of the Supercluster. It also worked closely with top scientists to discover the secrets of the Omniverse. Much of that work, unfortunately, was lost when one of its successors, Emperor G-Man Alpha, developed what could only be described as a "book-burning fetish".

Monk Phase

After its second term as Emperor, Horse MK.2 became very introspective. Inspired by its work with top physicists and researchers during its time as Emperor, Horse MK.2 turned to Buddhism, and slowly discarded all of its possessions in favor of a minimalist lifestyle. Horse MK.2 moved to Ghetsin 3 to study with the Warshippers, intrigued by legends it had heard of the Legume. It worked closely with Francis Merrigold, and even exchanged ideas with Rick Hernia, attempting to understand everything it possibly could understand. In time, Horse MK.2 became omniversally acclaimed for being one of the greatest thinkers of its epoch.

Death

During its time on Ghetsin 3, Horse MK.2 was fatally wounded during a Warshipper Orgy. While it called out in pain, dying in a damp, dark room in the Temple of Rannjoe, it exclaimed, "That's the meaning of life. Of course!". It then died. Francis Merrigold declined to comment on how Horse MK.2 was being used in the orgy that led to its untimely demise.

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
 {{DISPLAYTITLE:Horse MK.2}}
-[[File:Horsemk2.jpg|thumb|Horse MK.2 ]]
+[[File:Horsemk2b.png|thumb]]
 == Horse MK.2 ==
+{{Character|name=Horse MK.2|aliases=Emperor MK.2|affiliation=Waifurian Empire
+Farmer Charlies (Shareholder)|birthDate=03/22/193 B.B.|birthPlace=Columbus, Ohio|deathDate=06/22/100,542 A.B.|deathPlace=Temple of Rannjoe|gender=N/A|height=7'11'|weight=432 lbs.|eyes=Solar-powered}}
 Horse MK.2 was a cybersteed and Emperor of Waifuria. Notably, Horse MK.2 was indirectly partially responsible for the death of [[Saul Goodman]].
 === Early Childhood ===
-Horse MK.2 was synthesized in an Ohioan weapons lab in 193 B.B., during the [[The great META war|Great Meta War]]. He was created by Dr. Finshersnitch Ozband, who speculated that creating a 'cybersteed' would help the Ohioan armies gain the upper hand against the Combine and American forces.
+Horse MK.2 was synthesized in an Ohioan weapons lab in 193 B.B., during the [[The great META war|Great Meta War]]. It was created by [[Dr. Finshersnitch Ozband]], who speculated that creating a 'cybersteed' would help the Ohioan armies gain the upper hand against the Combine and American forces.
+=== Sentience ===
+While Ohio gained very little from Dr. Ozband's work, Horse MK.2 gained sentience due to a freak accident where a lab assistant accidentally connected his cerebral cortex to a neurocord and uploaded his conscience to Google Drive. Taking advantage of the situation, Dr. Ozband downloaded the assistant's conscience onto a USB drive and implanted it into Horse MK.2.
+=== Feelings of Remorse ===
+After the settlement of a lawsuit against the Christian Children's Foundation for Cancer research, Horse MK.2 realized that it had taken all of the money from this nonprofit organization. Its lawyers, [[G-Man and Goodman, Partners at Law|G-Man and Goodman]], reassured it that "their pain would soon be quelled". When Horse MK.2 attempted to return the money, [[Saul Goodman|Saul]] threatened it with a lawsuit for dishonoring the settlement. Horse MK.2 begrudgingly accepted the money, and invested it all into shares of [[Farmer Charlies]] stock.
+=== Imperial Reigns ===
+Horse MK.2 served as [[Waifurian Empire|Emperor of Waifuria]] twice (see [[Waifurian Dynasties]]). It was the only entity to do so twice in the same lifetime. Horse MK.2 made great strides in improving the intergalactic shipping routes of the Supercluster. It also worked closely with top scientists to discover the secrets of the Omniverse. Much of that work, unfortunately, was lost when one of its successors, Emperor [[G-Man (Timefracture Alpha)|G-Man Alpha]], developed what could only be described as a "book-burning fetish".
+=== Monk Phase ===
+After its second term as Emperor, Horse MK.2 became very introspective. Inspired by its work with top physicists and researchers during its time as Emperor, Horse MK.2 turned to Buddhism, and slowly discarded all of its possessions in favor of a minimalist lifestyle. Horse MK.2 moved to [[Ghetsin 3]] to study with the [[The Warshippers|Warshippers]], intrigued by legends it had heard of the [[Legume]]. It worked closely with [[Francis Merrigold]], and even exchanged ideas with [[Rick Hernia]], attempting to understand everything it possibly could understand. In time, Horse MK.2 became omniversally acclaimed for being one of the greatest thinkers of its epoch.
+=== Death ===
+During its time on Ghetsin 3, Horse MK.2 was fatally wounded during a Warshipper Orgy. While it called out in pain, dying in a damp, dark room in the [[Temple of Rannjoe]], it exclaimed, "That's the meaning of life. Of course!". It then died. Francis Merrigold declined to comment on how Horse MK.2 was being used in the orgy that led to its untimely demise.
+[[Category:Characters]]