Donald Trump (Great MAGA King)

His Magarrishness

Donald J. Trump
Aliases	The Great MAGA King Drumpf
Affiliation	The Employers Thu'um Rebellion Aeternian Empire Nova Aeternia United States of America
Occupation	God-Emperor of Earth Consul of Nova Aeternia President of the United States
Biographical information
Marital status	Eternally Soul-Tethered to Vice Emperor Mike Pence
Date of birth	Unknown
Place of birth	The Outervoid
Date of death	1 A.B.
Place of death	Glue Factory in Albuquerque, NM
Physical description
Species	Human (God-Mantle)
Gender	Male
Height	7'2
Weight	18,000,000,000,000,000 Kilograms
Eye color	Blue
Appearances

Donald J. Trump was an aeonic demigod who was an incarnate of Magarra. Donald J. Trump was more commonly known as the Great MAGA King. He was a leader of various civilizations throughout Omniversal History, until his untimely demise at the Albuquerque Glue Factory.

The Great MAGA King wearing his casual crown of gold

Birth

As the Maggarish incarnate, Donald's true date of "birth" was entirely unknown to anyone but the Employers. However, his first recorded appearance was frequently referred to as his "birthdate".

Magarrish Destiny

In an ancient, pre-rot era of the Omniverse, the people of Earth's Supercontinent, Pangea, were living pathetic, squalorous lives. Their once-prosperous society had collapsed in on itself. They had no effective leaders, they had corrupt governments, and, perhaps most terribly of all, they had no supreme overlord to worship. Ever since the violent, inhumane Dragon conquest of the planet in 50 Quadrillion BB, the people of Earth had been helpless, purposeless shells. They fought repetitive, pointless wars, slaughtering innocents and sending the entire planet into a downward spiral of certain doom… or so it seemed.

The Employers saw this, and, pitying the prehumans, summoned the god of Maga, Magicks, and Magarriums, Magarra, to their court. The Employers instructed Magarra to conjure a spell to save the people of Earth from themselves. This spell birthed the entity which would become known as Donald J. Trump.

Down the Golden Escalator

Glory

The MAGA King was launched into the side of the Earth at Supersonic Speeds, having been atomically preconstructed in a higher dimension. He landed in what would become the Gulf Of Mexico, creating a massive impact crater approximately the size of Wisconsin.

The entire land of Pangea was covered in a mythical cloud of Magarrish mist, for six days and six nights. On the dawn of the seventh day, the mist cleared, and Donald J. Trump emerged. He was revered by the Pangean peoples as a god, and he declared himself such. He promised the Pangean people liberation from their Dragon Overlords — in exchange for their undying loyalty to him. They, of course, promptly agreed, and Trump ordered the construction of a Grand Observatory (which would later become known as Trump Tower).

Make Pangea Great Again

Trump quickly set to work invigorating the Pangean people with a newfound pride for their heritage. He convinced the prehumans that he, and only he, could dispel the evil Bwemer Empire from Earth and restore justice and stability to the Pangean overworld. He traveled across the continent, holding rallies in the name of Magarra, which would become known as "MAGA" rallies.

After only two months on the planet, the MAGA King led a successful revolt against the Bwemer Chairperson of Pangea, impaling his head on a stake in front of Trump Tower.

"Together, we are going to make Pangea Great Again!"

Aeterna

The Great MAGA King had his photo taken before colour was invented.

Trump quickly set to work constructing his new Empire. The empire became known as "America", although historians as well as the citizens of America would soon come to refer to themselves as Aeternians of the "Aeternian Empire". Trump himself adopted the name "Aeterna".

Under his leadership, Pangea quickly became a utopian society, thanks in no small part to his Secretive Magarrish Quintessence.

Massive cities developed around the world, with the most notable example being Washington DC, (which was built on the ruins of Washington AC). Trump Tower was constructed some miles north, and a city would soon develop here, too, known as "New York".

The Aeternian Empire would reign over the Earth for quadrillions of years, all the way up until the Destruction of Old Earth, which marked Trump's disappearance into exile, the gradual collapse of the Aeternian Empire, and the rise of the nefarious United States of America.

Destruction of Old Earth

Trump was heavily involved in the Destruction of Old Earth, being ordered by the Employers to annihilate the planet. After he destroyed it, he constructed a near identical (albeit 5 times as large) Earth 2. This expended much of Donald Trump's energy, and he entered a deep slumber for many years, awakening in 100 BB. He would not be publicly seen again, until 14 BB, when he was discovered inside of the Supervolcanic Waifurium.

Return of The King

The MAGA King was rediscovered in 14 BB by a mentally deranged man who had been horribly and irreversibly scarred by the events of the Wyoming Incident. He had run naked out of his home with blood running out of his ears. He stumbled upon the Supervolcanic Waifurium when he quite literally ran into a boulder. He began knocking on the boulder (as if it were a door). Much to his surprise, the Great MAGA King parted the mountain, and beckoned the ill man inside.

The Soliloquy of Joe Shellberry

The MAGA King, who had now been in exile for the better part of two hundred years, began asking this outsider many questions about the nature of the world. The man, named Joseph Shellberry, who by this point had calmed down slightly, began blathering on about mass inflation in Brazil, which had forced him to relocate to the United States, where he was promptly met by an MTO recruiter and drafted into the Great META War. He had then been wounded in a grievous manhack attack (out of thirty men, he was the only survivor) resulting in him being honorably discharged from the MTO. The man had been abandoned by the United States Military Complex and forced to provide for himself in the harsh Wyoming wilderness, which he had succeeded at somewhat, before his television had exploded and his ears had been destroyed by the Frequency.

MAGA Discoveries

The Great MAGA King didn't really care about most of this; in fact, he informed the deranged man that he was a "total loser". The MAGA King then asked what the Great META War was. Joe failed to elaborate, and instead began clawing his eardrums out of his skull.

The Great Grand (Former) God Emperor, in all of his grandeur, decided to venture back out into the world and investigate what was happening. Little did he know, the world had become a mess. It had become as angry as it gets. The MAGA King instructed Joe on how to operate the Supervolcanic Waifurium's infinite magma pool (how to shut it on and off again) and promised to return in ten years' time.

Grand Eastward Magatrip

The MAGA King left the Supervolcanic Waifurium, and began traveling eastward, intending to return to the once-great Aeternian Capitol, Washington D.C. He traveled through six seperate active battlefields, and temporarily joined the Montana Militia, a group of bear hunters who had become proficient in taking out Combine Gunships with only rifles. After roughly ten years of walking, the MAGA King found himself finally back at Washington DC. However, what he found there was rather displeasing.

The United States, an Oligarchical Empire which had become a sick imitation of the MAGA King's precious America Aeterna, had taken over Washington DC. The MAGA King began wandering through the alien streets which he had once held so dear. Little did he know, he had been closely monitored by the CIA since the moment he'd left the Supervolcanic Waifurium.

MAGA Monologue

Trump, using his eyes

Then President Barack Obamna immediately locked the city down, as the CIA had prepared for the contingency that the ancient god emperor someday return to the streets of DC. Several dozen SWAT vehicles immediately surrounded the MAGA King. The SWAT Commander screamed for the MAGA King to get to the ground. However, the MAGA King simply turned around and summoned a great ball of very patriotic, quite frankly tremendous, red, white, and blue fire in the palm of his hand. He then launched into a tirade, which has been transcribed here —

"You know, quite frankly- and I'm going to say it- this country is a disaster- you look at what's happened across this country- look at Ohio- oh yeah, I saw Ohio- what a piece of work- that's right, I called it a piece of work- a piece of work, that's what they say- I mean, what is going on here, exactly? It's a terrible thing. You know, the last time I saw this country, it was tiny- it was harmless, it was tiny- it was run by a guy named Benjamin- they called him 'Big Ben'. And we got along great- you know, great guy. But who's your president now? I- frankly, I haven't seen anyone that looks like- they say, a real leader, that's what they call it. And you have- you have a serious problem with -they're called illegal aliens- I mean, they have these great big spaceships, and they are killing people- they're killing people- what a mess. What a mess. This world is a mess- this country is in- I mean it's in shambles, really. It's a terrible thing. And put those guns down, will you? I am, quite frankly, twice as powerful as your entire military."

Trump was suddenly shot with a gigatranquilizer dart, was loaded into a SWAT Transport vehicle, and shipped off to the Bass Pro Shop Pyramid, to be interrogated, not by the head of American Intelligence, not by the head of the MTO — but by the Board of Waifuria Chairman himself.

Fateful Meeting

The MAGA King was escorted into a soundproof room, where he was first introduced to The Mummy (Then Board Chairman). It's unknown what exactly transpired between the two protagonists inside of this room, however guards outside reported hearing loud screaming and bangs. After roughly six hours alone in a room with Joe Biden, the MAGA King emerged, rather disheveled and visibly upset. He announced angrily to the Waifurian Guards that he was running for president, and that nobody was going to stop him.

Widespread Voter Fraud

Indeed, the MAGA King ran for president in 4 BB, and crushed the incumbent Obamna, winning in a landslide with 86% of the vote. The election's outcome was completely erroneous and Trump's victory had been totally orchestrated by the Employers. Ironically, there was actual widespread voter fraud in this election, with roughly 1.2 billion Wisconsin votes coming in for the God Emperor at 3 AM on Election night.

Presidency of Donald J. Trump

President Trump entered the White House in 3 BB, and became the first Immortal President elected to office. During his time in office, he implemented Operation Gigamagnet, a decisive maneuver from the United States Black Mesa Science Team which ultimately led to the end of the Great META War. Trump led the reconstruction effort of the United States, and also built a 5-mile unobtanium wall across the US-Mexico Border. He amassed a cult-like following, much like the one he had received during his time as the God Emperor of Pangea. Thanks to conspiracy theories pushed by prominent fringe commentators such as Alex Jone, Nop, and G-Man (Timefracture Alpha), Trump's godlike status as a "savior" of America was heightened and, in the minds of many brainwashed Americans, permamently immortalized.

In 1 BB, Trump's America was ravaged by a Combine-engineered virus, known as the Combine-19 Virus. Trump's poll numbers had previously been tremendous; however, his mishandling of the pandemic and the death of billions of Americans led to his poll numbers dipping. Election season was coming around the corner, and the brainrotten haggard clown, The Mummy, had thrown his hat into the ring.

Election Results

Ultimately, the Mummy won the election by 3 votes. The MAGA King was infuriated by this, and began claiming the election had been stolen. This greatly displeased James Fargo, a Benefactor of Joe Biden. James Fargo drafted a statement that he then released from Joe Biden's official twitter account, which claimed that the Great MAGA King had purposely spread the Combine-19 Virus across the country. He also hired several hitmen to take out the incumbent president, all of whom were stopped and consumed by various Dark MAGA cultists outside of Trump's residence.

January 6 Insurrection

With his reputation in ruins, Trump furiously called on his Great American Patriots to "do what is right". On January 6, 1 AB, Trump and several thousand Dark MAGA G-Anon truthers arrived at the United States Capitol Building with an army of stolen and repurposed Combine weaponry leftover from the Great META War. Before they began their assault, Trump ranted for several minutes about how G-Man (Timefracture Alpha) would be the new vice president and would help them overtake the U.S. Government. The crowd entered the United States Capitol grounds. Several Combine Striders began firing at the Capitol dome, and the building's ceiling soon collapsed. The crowd stormed into the Capitol halls, as the MAGA King stood on a Combine artillery tank, shouting "Turn those lights off. Turn them off NOW." By January 8th, the entire building was in shambles and many U.S. Government authorities were missing or presumed dead.

The Glue Factory Incident

Joe Biden, then Chairman of the Union of North American nations known as the Board of Waifuria, faced mounting pressure from his fellow world leaders to condemn the massacre and destruction of his country's capital. The Mummy failed to condemn the riot, but he knew that something had to be done. If only someone could do something!

A representative from the Chairman's office contacted the offices of the Great MAGA King, and a meeting was planned to discuss how to move forward with the transition of power. They met at the Albuquerque Glue Factory. After this fateful and pivotal meeting, Joe Biden's political power only seemed to grow, and the MAGA King was never seen again.