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Latest revision as of 16:53, 7 April 2026

The Celery Gangstalker
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| Celery Gangstalker | |
|---|---|
| Aliases | Sir Celery
|
| Affiliation | Celery Stealer |
| Occupation | Celery Gangstalker |
| Biographical information | |
| Date of birth | September 6, 76 B.B |
| Place of birth | Cicero, Illinois |
| Date of death | September 17, 67 A.B. |
| Place of death | Sicily, Italy |
| Physical description | |
| Species | Supercelery |
| Gender | Celery |
| Height | 6'7 |
| Weight | 66 Kg |
| Eye color | Small |
| Appearances | |
Soliloquy
edit edit sourceThe Celery Gangstalker was a stalker who stalked stalks of celery. He started stalking celery when someone said celery smelled sickly, something which stalled the ticklish temper of the strict celery stickler Celery Gangstalker. The Scourge of Celery Salesmen, as some said he was called, scoured the celery sellers of several cities and states, stealing and severing several celery stalks septennially. A Celery Soliloquy, smitten with steaming celery imagery and a small teal seal, and smited by the Seaside Seal Seal, Seymore, was discovered somewhere in the residence of the Celery Gangstalker. The Celery Secretary sent six secret service operatives to stop Sir Celery from securing stolen stalks of celery.
Skyrocketing Celery Salary and Suspension by Stalk
edit edit sourceThe celery salary of celery farmers skyrocketed stupendously some time after the Celery Gangstalker was sussed out by the six secret service agents and subsequently suspended posthumously in a surruptitious state from a single celery stalk in Sicily. Several celery saleman said, smiling, "our celery salary is safe!"