Quiet One

The Quiet One

The Quiet One was a nightmare-feasting Mesopotamian Chaedra, renowned around the Meditarrenean for its terrible deeds.

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The first reports of the Quiet One originated from the early Mesopotamian people, who reported a 'ghost with gems for eyes' on the outskirts of their rice paddies. According to Joan Brassel Ph.D of Ridgeshire College, "The Quiet One was perhaps one of the earliest examples of an 'Urban Legend' gone wild. The children of Mesopotamia were feareful of the Quiet One; and rightfully so." Ancient Cuneiform tablets tell of routine harvests, stonings, and trade receipts. However, one particular tablet, dubbed the 'Accursed Tab", featured sprawling, self-contradictory writings concerning the Quiet One; as well gruesomely listing as the horrific state in which it rendered many of its victims.

Accursed Tab Section 1

In Accursed Tab, section 1, the Mesopotamian Philosopher Mat Ra writes; "The first Victim was Elder Fie; who was found without hand and without organ in the mud outside our paddy. She was still alive." later on, Mat Ra's handwriting becomes jagged; abnormal, even, and he continues, "Elder Fie was uninjured. None were harmed. I am going, now." The passage abruptly ends after this.

Accursed Tab Section 2

The second passage was infinitely more disturbing than the last; with lists of miscellaneous body parts found scattered around the villages. At times, extremities were located anomalously beneath pillows, beds, or in wells. Mat Ra details a horrendium in which the Carrot Yield for one year, when piled together, was discovered to have been rife with human fingers and toes. Mat also details how the Village Cleric's donkey mysteriously gave 'birth' to a severed human head.

Cuneiform writings of the 'Quiet One'

Work Experience

The Quiet One was an objectively terrible individual. It perched itself on the roofs of straw and mud huts at night, licking its cracked and charred lips as it 'listened' to the dreams of the humans below. It waited until the people were in REM sleep- when they were most vulnerable, and then, in a wretched, horrid move, dropped its long, goo-like phallus down from beneath its legs. The phallus crept, like a snake, down the roofs and into the windows or doorways, wrapping around posts and table legs to stabilize itself. The phallus would creep up onto the beds and ejaculate Death Cum over the faces of its victims; thus rendering them suffocated and immobile. After the victim was demobilized, the rotten Quiet One would drop into the house after its phallus, picking the extremity up and swinging it around like a lasso. It wrapped the phallus around the neck of the victim and dragged them outside, all without making a peep. The bodies were usually found, dismembered and scattered the next day.

Unemployment

The Quiet One was forced to find new work following the advent of modern technologies such as Doors and Windows. This was not grand for the Quiet One, who very much enjoyed feasting upon its human victims. Alas, it was forced to move out of the region, but not without exacting a terrible toll on Mesopotamia. The Quiet One, one fateful evening, bent down to the lush, fertile grasses, and suctioned its phallus to the field. The humans, now travelling with muskets and cannons, would surely execute it on sight; so it needed to act fast. The Quiet One began the Forbidden Process of Reverse Ejaculation, with fervor that made even Malike Tragedia and Odge shudder. All in one monstrous, vile, inconcievable jolt, the Quiet One suctioned the moisture and minerals out of the ground of the whole region, drying up inumerable crop fields and paddies. It's testicles dragged enormously after it, and the Quiet One lept into the Mediterranean Sea,

Testicular Travels

The Quiet One's testicles, its 'jewels', if you will (and I don't care if you won't) were incredible buoyant; each spanning a diameter of over half a mile. These monstrous balls, holding the lifeblood of Mesopotamia within them, floated through the sea, the Quiet One riding atop them. It felt incredibly healthy and powerful, despite its obvious bodily afflictions, and aimed to begin anew feasting on human nightmares when it struck land again.

Mount Etna, on the island of Sicily.

Deflation Tactic

Unfortunately for the Quiet One, it would be some time before it hit landfall. It floated through the salty sea for 40 days and 40 nights, before finally, it felt a great scratching upon its left Nut and realized, with excellent satisfaction, it had struck land. This was a cause of such celebration for the Quiet One, such need to release its joy, that it immediately ejaculated. The lush, vibrant minerals and life of Mesopotamia were exploded onto the island of Sicily, transforming arid mountains and ravines into verdant creeks and valleys. Orchards of Rice grew powerfully; and rightfully so, for the ejaculation of the Quiet One was one continuus orgasm lasting the better part of 2 years.

After the Ejaculation, the Quiet One was rather tired, and finally, its balls having been reduced in size back to 'normal', stepped foot onto the island. it was pleasantly surprised to see the beautiful forests sprawling out in front of it; and felt a great deal of pride about this fact. To top off all of this excitement, indeed, the Quiet One caught a familiar, comforting whiff; that untamable odor of Humanity.

The Most Dangerous Game

And so the Quiet One ventured into the lush hills of Sicily; and stumbled upon, soon enough, a gathering of Greek Soldiers. It spotted several ships docked at a coastal bay, and heard them cajoling one another concerning their foods. "We shall never leave this place, Odysseus!" One soldier jeered, "For all the food and drink a man could ever need is right here beneath our feet."

"Aye," replied the leader, Odysseus, "If only there were women here, we should never leave." The Quiet One licked its wretched lips and crept toward the men, its claws out, its phallus dangling. However, something did not feel right about the Quiet One's Phallus. It looked down and found it still short and flaccid. The Quiet One was unable, or unwilling, to 'get it up'. It was suffering from Erectile Dysfunction, which, according to the American Journal of Medicine, "affects over 18 million men in the US or 18.4% of the male population aged 20 years or older. The crude prevalence of erectile dysfunction was over 50% among men with diabetes."