United States 2020 Election

The United States 2020 Election (Often referred to as the 2020 Election) was the final election cycle in the United States of America before the ascension of the Mummy to North American Overlord and later, Emperor. It took place from 1 BB to 0 AB.

Overview

There were two political parties involved in this election, as there had been (astoundingly) for the past 230 years, with the Mummy and Kamala Harris on the Blue Corporate Interests ticket, and incumbent The Great Maga King and Mike Pence on the Red Corporate Interests ticket.

Corporate Interests

There was very little ideological difference between the Blue Corporate Interests Party and the Red Corporate Interests Party. The Red Party typically worked to dismantle the American Government and strip rights from citizens, while the Blue Party fought hard to do absolutely nothing about it.

Presidential Debates

There were two presidential debates held during this election cycle, the First Presidential Debate and the Third Presidential Debate. As was custom and American Tradition, third-party candidates such as G-Man (Timefracture Alpha) and the Yonise were not invited to the debate stage (only the two corrupt corporate interest parties were allowed to actually govern or even have a chance at governance).

Presidential Quotes

Below are some incredible quotes from the two most competent and stable-minded individuals in America during the 2020 Election.

March 22, 1 BB

Joe Biden: One point two billion. So you go ahead and stack spaghetti sauce at a store in-in-in a supermarket. You control the guy or the woman that runs the rub...run-brings out the carts on-on-or-on a forklift. What happened?

March 23, 1 BB

Joe Biden (to Audience member): But look, fat, look. Here's the deal..."

April 1, 1 BB

Trump (speaking to preschoolers): So, we got our great American gigamagnet, made right here in the USA, by the way, and we- we fucking magnet the hell out of em. ‘Get those Combine fucks outta here’, I told him.

July 4th, 1 BB

Trump: I’ll walk into that audience, I’ll walk in there, kiss everyone in that audience. I’ll kiss the guys and the beautiful women.

July 17th, 1 BB

Joe Biden (speaking about prepubescent children): And I want to see these beautiful young ladies- I want to see them dancing when they're four years older too.

July 20th, 1 BB

Trump: Israel has hypnotized the world. May Allah Awaken the people and help them to see the evil doings of Israel, and the United States.

October 6, 0 AB (Debate 1)

Trump: Don’t ever use the word smart with me, Joe.

Biden: P-Pomegranate. Folks, this is what he does.

Trump: I do what, Joe? What’s the matter? Am I hurting your rotten brain?

Biden: Will you shut up, man?

Trump: I’ve fucked a lot of folks, Joe. I’ll fuck you too.

[CROWD GASPS]

October 18, 0 AB (Debate 3)

Debate Moderator: Are you at all concerned your Xen creature ban is going to cause more anger among vortigaunts around the world?

Trump: Anger? There’s plenty of anger right now. How can you have more?

Debate Moderator: You don’t think it will exacerbate the problem?

Trump: David, David—I mean, I know you’re a sophisticated guy. The world is a mess. The world is as angry as it gets. What you think this is going to cause a little more anger? The world is an angry place. All of this has happened. We went into Ohio. We shouldn’t have gone into Ohio. We shouldn’t have gotten out the way we got out- nuclear pumpkin and all. The world is a total mess. The world is a mess, David.