Cybetronic Police Department of Northeastern San Francisco

The Lower-Class Unit (Officer Class- Level 1) of the Cybertronic Police Department of Northeastern San Francisco.

The Cybertronic Police Department of Northeastern San Francisco (abbreviated unhelpfully as CPDONSF) was a division of the San Francisco County Police Department, which was created by The Grand Duchy of California, Governor Gavin G. G. G. Newsomium, in 2 AB. The Department was conceived for two reasons; firstly, because crime was becoming so rampant in the rapidly developing and unstable North American Overlorddom, and secondly, because the police were lazy and didn't actually care about doing their jobs that much.

The Nodes

This new synthezoid police force, which were colloquially known by San Francisco residents as the "Cyberhogs", was comprised of two hundred completely cybetronic AI-run individuals, who were given designation numbers and nicknames, such as Bill, Mill, Fill, or even, Dill. These robots would recieve daily programming from three Nodes located throughout Northeastern San Francisco; these were the West Node, the North Node, and the Under Node. The Under Node dwelled eighteen miles below the city's surface, and was thus the main Node and a backup Node should any of the other Nodes go offline.

Duties of the Cyberhogs

Their regular duties varied day to day, however, some typical expectations of a Cybertronic Officer might include:

-Arrest minority for possession of substance

-Wave hello to elderly G-Anon cultists who are attempting to enter the City Hall

-Murder an unarmed teenager

-Eat Donut (3x)

-Sit Idle in car; wait for red vehicle to approach; immediately pull over and question driver

Tusk's Terrible Tesla Attack

In 3 AB, just two months after their inception on November 30, the Cybertronic Police Department's Western Node (from which the Western Officers all recieved their programming for the day) was attacked by a seemingly-rogue Tesla Model X automobile. The Western Hive Mind was severely damaged when the vehicle smashed through the wall at 200 km/h and obliterated the server room. As a result, nearly fifty Cybertronic Officers fell unconscious for nearly six hours.

Entrepreneur and closeted war criminal Elon Tusk, who was beginning to be investigated for potential involvement in the China-Mars Conflict, was subpoenad for yet another Overlorddish Investigatium, this time for an inquiry as to why one of his vehicles had attempted to debilitate the Golden city's Great American Police Department.

Elon was summoned to Memphis, Tennessee, and brought before the Grand Court (the reformed Supreme Court, which consisted of only one justice, that being Minister of Speech and former Board of Waifuria Chairman James L. Fuck). James L. Fuck, after reviewing the footage of the Tesla attack for several hours, declared Elon was innocent (as the Grand Court ruled that the car had exhibited 'suicidal tendencies', which explained the 'kamikaze event' at the Western Node). However, Grand Justice Fuck declared that should any further malicious contact occur between Elon's vehicles and the Cybertronic Police Force, that he would reopen the investigation, as well as consider sending Overlorddish Superpredators in to 'sort things out'.

Cybertronic Police Tesla War

Thus began a soft war between the Teslas and the Cyborg Police Force. Tesla vehicles would frequent areas where the Cyber Police were stationed, bearing 'Fuck the Blue' flags and doing burnouts in the middle of busy intersections. Elon Tusk strongly condemned this violence from his vehicles, but explained he was too busy with the 'illustrious' Glop Bulb to launch an investigation into their "anti-fascist behavior". Cyborg Police Officers would attempt to pull over the Teslas, but found that they were unpiloted, and thus would experience code malfunctions as the Nodes did not account for how to arrest an unmanned vehicle.