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=== Plotting the Death of a Dead Man === | === Plotting the Death of a Dead Man === | ||
Many in the Waifurian Government complained about the [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)|Emperor]]'s general lack of awareness and lamented his immortality. Marvin and several generals began hatching a plan- a coup attempt- to rid the Omniverse of the terrible Mummy forever. While they couldn't physically kill him, there was a way to completely annihilate his essence- and sever his spiritual ties with the [[Legume]]. | Many in the Waifurian Government complained about the [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)|Emperor]]'s general lack of awareness and lamented his immortality. There was also great displeasure at the needless loss of life from the Waifurian Civil War that Biden orchestrated during his zombo-cybertronic state in his [[Joe Biden’s Dog Days|Dog Days]]. Marvin and several generals began hatching a plan- a coup attempt- to rid the Omniverse of the terrible Mummy forever. While they couldn't physically kill him, there was a way to completely annihilate his essence- and sever his spiritual ties with the [[Legume]]. | ||
In order to do this, the Emperor had to be exposed to something very hot- something which would completely and totally reverse the stabilization of his [[Glue Form]] (which he had been existing in from the shoulders down for the past 44,000 years). | In order to do this, the Emperor had to be exposed to something very hot- something which would completely and totally reverse the stabilization of his [[Glue Form]] (which he had been existing in from the shoulders down for the past 44,000 years). | ||
Revision as of 14:19, 11 July 2022

| Marvin Fluxton | |
|---|---|
| Aliases | Emperor Fluxton
|
| Affiliation | Waifurian Empire |
| Occupation | Emperor |
| Biographical information | |
| Marital status | Fuxette Fluxton |
| Date of birth | 44,299 A.B. |
| Place of birth | Bidenheim, Jupiter |
| Date of death | 44,391 A.B. |
| Place of death | Memphis, Tennessee |
| Physical description | |
| Species | Human |
| Gender | Male |
| Height | 5'1 |
| Weight | 104 lbs |
| Eye color | brown |
| Appearances | |
Marvin Fluxton was a quirked up Waifurian Emperor who was responsible for the death of Joe Biden. He famously murdered the Mummy in the Omniverse's first Solar Coup, where the sleeping Emperor was shot into a star in an escape pod at the speed of sound. This was the only non-peaceful transfer of power during the entire reign of the Waifurian Empire.
Rising up the Ranks
Marvin joined the Waifurian Empire at a young age, because of the ruthless Conscription requirements enacted by Joe Biden. Marvin was only 12 years old when he was ripped from his family and forced to begin training on how best to conquer innocent civilizations.
While learning at the Joseph Biden Military Academy, Marvin stood out among his pupils for being healthy. Most of the conscripts of this batch had been pulled from an ambush at a Church of Virgins recruitment seminar, and thus were unable to function at the Academy due to a low volume of processed grainbased foods. Marvin was noticed by high-level government officials, and his records were sent to the Emperor Biden at the Bass Pro Shop Pyramid.
Manipulation
Joe Biden was concurrently sufferring several simultaneous strokes, and accidentally clicked "summon" on his Gigatablet while reviewing Marvin's information.
Marvin was at first weary about the meeting. What was so special about him that made Joe Biden want to meet him? Marvin plotted to take advantage of the situation.
The longer Marvin thought about it, the more he realized what a unique position he was in. he could effectively seize power with nobody else knowing. If Biden thought he was special enough to meet as a lowly cadet, Marvin was going to become special. Marvin began doctoring numerous awards, certificates, and achievements. Marvin had grown to detest Joe Biden's policies and his blatant disregard for the basic quality of life of his constituents, and saw an opportunity for revenge.
When the two finally met, Marvin had thought he'd been prepared for anything; however, he certainly hadn't been prepared for Joe Biden to embrace him with a warm hug and say "I missed you, son".
Learning of Legume
Marvin went along with Biden's mysterious case of mistaken identity, pretending to be Hunter Biden.
Joe Biden apologized to Marvin for never giving him a true imperial position, and asked him to be his Vice Emperor. He asked Marvin to forgive him.
Marvin, hiding his joy at the brainrotten Emperor, responded, "Yes, father. I would be honored".
Over the next several years, Biden would teach his 'son' in the ways of the Legume, and instructed him on how to properly use and care for the entity's magic. While training with Biden, Marvin secretly made many allies behind the Emperor's back.
Plotting the Death of a Dead Man
Many in the Waifurian Government complained about the Emperor's general lack of awareness and lamented his immortality. There was also great displeasure at the needless loss of life from the Waifurian Civil War that Biden orchestrated during his zombo-cybertronic state in his Dog Days. Marvin and several generals began hatching a plan- a coup attempt- to rid the Omniverse of the terrible Mummy forever. While they couldn't physically kill him, there was a way to completely annihilate his essence- and sever his spiritual ties with the Legume.
In order to do this, the Emperor had to be exposed to something very hot- something which would completely and totally reverse the stabilization of his Glue Form (which he had been existing in from the shoulders down for the past 44,000 years).
When the Mummy boarded his imperial vessel for a routine System Sweep, Fluxton insisted on coming along. In response, Biden commented that 'the leg hair' was 'getting long again'. Fluxton and Biden walked to the bridge, and stood together for one final time.
After several long minutes, Biden became drowsy, and remarked that he would be going up to his quarters. Fluxton offered to walk him there. Fluxton led Biden past the dormitories and into the Escape Pod Bay. He leaned Biden against the wall. Biden looked up at him deliriously.
"Ch-ch-...", he said, faintly.
"What is it, my lord?"
"Chocolate chocolate chip, man."
Marvin opened the nearest escape pod door and placed Biden into the chair. He strapped the sleeping Mummy in and stood in silence for a second.
"You've made me proud, son", Biden said, before nodding off.
Marvin, for a moment, second guessed what he was about to do, but ultimately decided to hit the eject button. Biden shot off towards the Alpha Centauri system. where he would meet a fateful end at Alpha Centauri B. The Mummy was no more.
Legacy
As Emperor, Marvin instituted numerous progressive policies. These included ending the conscription of underaged individuals, the outlawing the distribution of Methamphetamine in the Waifurian Empire, and a new, more democratic system of leadership. The Waifurian Empire became a republic in all respects except for its insatiable appetite for expansion.
Hunter Biden Hate Effigy
Hunter Biden constructed a large bronze statue of Marvin Fluxton, which he gave an incredibly small penis. Hunter would scorch the statue with various welding utensils, hoping Marvin could feel the injuries from beyond the grave. Despite his estrangement from his father, Hunter hated Fluxton for murdering his father, but, more importantly, he hated Marvin for getting to be the son he never could.