Billy D. Donut

William Donut Donut

William Donut Donut
Aliases	State Comptroller, Billy D. Donut, Mr. Donut, Big Donut, The Big Donut, The Big Glaze, Mr. Glaze, Senor Glaze, Glaz-O-Tron, The Glaze Gladiator
Relatives	Donut Donut (Father) Marianna Valasquez-Donut (Father) Miguel Hernandez-Donut (Grandfather) Luiza Hernandez-Donut (Grandmother) Francene Hernandez-Donut (Aunt/Sister)
Affiliation	Texas Red Corporate Interests Party Texas State Government Texas Waifurian Mandate Patrollium
Occupation	Comptroller; Lawyer
Biographical information
Marital status	God/Jesus Christ (Religious Man)
Date of birth	05/30/188 BB
Place of birth	Old El Paso, Texas
Date of death	Grimsnap's Day
Place of death	William D. Donut Burial Memorial Gallery, Amarillo, Texas, 79101
Physical description
Species	Humash/Donutrian
Gender	Malent
Height	5'11" (Nonglazed) 6'8" (Glazed)
Weight	175 lbs (Nonglazed) 250 lbs (Glazed)
Eye color	Blue
Appearances

William D. Donut was a huge, dicklean Texas resident hailed as a local hero, Comptroller, and Texan Legend. He's.... been a round. ;)

Earlymash Life

William D. Donut was swaws-birthed in Old El Paso, Texas, in the Taco seasoning factory where his Fathers worked. He was birthed in a vat of sugar and spice and all things nice, originally intended for Churro production. William D. Donut was birthed from his Father Marianna's womb (cisgender F) on top of the flour cart. Because of this birthlean location, his DNA was fused instantly with starches and carbohydrates, rendering him doughy and bread-like in nature. Becuase he came out headfirst, of course, his head was especially effected, altering his appearance and structure to one similar to a donut. The large gaping hole in the middle of his head was from an unrelated birth defect.

He was raised in a barn, as his family was barn-residual, after all houses had been banned by Texas State Legislature (to prevent home break-ins). His father Donut<ref>His father, despite his name 'donut', was not a donut at all'; he more resembled a baguette, or a finger pastry, or both, or possibly even, potentially, even, neither. </ref>'s night occupation was to locate water in regional Texas. Water had become scarce in Texas in the course of the Great META War, as it was being traded for currency in the Southwest United States.

As a child, he befriended cows, goats, chickens, and stray Xen fauna. He knew no other children, for his parents feared that Billy would be bullied for his condition. Billy, for his part, was not allowed near mirrors, and was unaware of his donutlean affliction. However, when Billy was 4 years old, in 184 BB, he witnessed his reflection in a pail of water left by farmhands and Jack and Jill. He was mortified, at first believing he had been shot in the head; however, his fathers quickyl came to his aide, reassuring Billy he was a normal boy and that what had been seen in the reflection was nothing more than an illusion; a truck of the mind. Billy, after some considerable negotiation, was convinced of this.

However, it was not long before Billy again identified his reflection. He saw it in a pond, and then in a trough, in a puddle, and in the ice. He realized his parents were lying to him; although why, he did not know.

Donutlean

He would have had more time to ponder this had not the family farm been attacked by famed cowboy outlaw and WebMD founder Dr. Jesse James, MD. James and his posse of qualified medical practicioners (including nurses, dentists, optometrists, and cardiologists) brutally massacred the animals on the farm, harvested their organs, and beheaded both of Billy's parents. This was known as the 'Animal Farm'. His father Marianna narrowly survived, thanks to CPR; however, his father Donut became deceased.

Billy was broken. Dr. Jesse James MD performed a concert-length rendition of "Ain't No Rest for the Wicked" for Billy before jumping out the window with all of the family's savings, and taking a bite out of Donut Donut's breadlean head.

Billy and his father (F) immediately called the Texas Town Police Department, and were told that a squad car and ambulance would be immediately on their way. 4 hours later, they arrived. Chief Fat Clumt, the chief of the Texas Town Police Department, arrived munching on a donut, something extremely upsetting, & traumatizing to Billy and his Father Marianna. His Father subsequently passed away from Shik.

Billy, left to his own devices, had witnessed an outrageous miscarriage of justice. A complete moral failing on every level, and at the ripe spring age of 5 years old. He had only barely finished puberty, and already had lost everything and everyone he'd ever loved.\

Law Schewl

So, naturally, Billy sought to fight back against this system and deliver justice for his parents and farm friends. At the age of 7, and the height of 5'10", he enrolled in Texas Town Law School, which was completely funded for all prospective students on account of a Woke 'Education for All' Policy put forth by radical Leftist Anarcho-Syndacalist and later Charl-Marx Aligned free thinking U.S. President Andrew Jackson.

He was enrolled in a class of 45,001 students, the class of 1842 (178 BB). Because he was stupid and uneducated, he finished his first semester at the bottom of his class, however, he began taking Heroin, and rose to the top of his class. He finished after 3 years of Law School in 178 BB with a law degree and graduated Magna Cum Loudly (top 95%).

He thusly was accepted for a legal internship with the Old El Paso Government. He assisted District Attorney Henrietta A. Fuck in the clearing of lands for the construction of oil plantations, and served in a largely clerical role. After one year, this legal internship expired, and Billy applied to, and was hired to become, the Old El Paso city Finance Manager. This was grank, and as first act as Finance Manager, Billy immediately boosted resources towards funding law enforcement. (400% increase). He did this believing he could stop anything like what happened to his parents and farm from happening again. However, much to the dissapointment of Billy D. Donut, this would not be what would transpire.

What actually happened was a 400% increase in Police Officers and weaponry and vehicles; however, this did NOT result in less crime; in fact, there was actually an uptick in arrests and offenses following this funding increase. Police arrival times were SLOWER, and the number of Murders in Old El Paso jumped from 44 in 177 BB to 214,530 in 176 BB - a somewhat significant increase.

This upset Billy.

American Civil War Involvement & Gender Transition Booth

Billy continued in this position a further several years, and on his 29th birthday in 159 BB, the American Civil War began. The southern states seceded, or were made to secede, and largely sided with the Combine-aligned Ohio Mandate during this conflict, rendering Billy at odds with the United States - and facing a new and unprecedented massive funding shortfall that seemed insurmountable.

Old El Paso, and indeed Texas as a whole, was out of money. They had been completely subsidized by the Federal Government, due to being a rinky dinky desert town with no economic value aside from water trading. The Combine had access to infinite water, and provided this generously to Texas, in exchange for an obligatory exchange of sheep & horses on the first Sunday of each month. This agreement was nonnegotiable. The animals were used to create cyborg Sheep 23 & Horse hybrids known as 'Cavalroids' which patrolled the border with the United States and commited egregious war crimes.

Billy was no fan of the Combine; but saw how little control he truly had over their doings. He remembered the attack of Dr. Jesse James when he was a child; and how helpless and outclassed his family had been. Billy resigned himself to do his best for Old El Paso and Texas - even if that meant accepting temporary Combine rule. So he sought alternative income streams.

And then it hit him, of course. Create free-to-use easy-access gender transition booths in public spaces. A rare commodity in the 1860's; Billy saw these booths could transform Old El Paso's economy and help offset the massive deficit gained from secession. He approached a combine overwatch trooper about this goal; intrigued, the trooper arranged a meeting for Billy with the Governor of Texas, General Grievous.

Proposal Oval

Billy's meeting with Grievous was hosted in the Old El Paso courthouse, and Grievous reported feeling agitated with the lack of air conditioning. Billy explained to the general that Texas could no longer afford air conditioning because of their economy's crippling reliance on the United States govermint. He presented intricate details of the proposed Sex Change stations, and suggested the Combine charge non-Texans a small fee in order to use the machine, but facilitate public transit and advertising to make it known that Texas was the Transgender capital of the world.

An example of a billboard used to advertise Texas' new identity as the Transgender capital of the world- featuring Billy D. Donut and Texas Military Governor Robert C. Combine-Combine-Combine.

Grievous was initially hesitant, as the Combine did not recognize Transgender identities. However, he was ultimately convinced by the scale of proposed revenue - $400,000,000,000 in 5 years - and the reassurance that recognition would be decided on a state by state basis.

A Big Texan Success (Lime)

The sex change stations were a massive success, bringing in 200,000,000,000 USD to Texas within the first six months, smashing the expectations set by Billy. He was subsequently promoted to Texas comptroller for the entire town of Texas (Texas Military President Robert C. Combine-Combine-Combine executed the previous comptroller to make room for Billy, something the Donut would not ever know).

As Comptroller, Billy oversaw the expansion of the Gender Transition Program, receiving substantial investments from the C.O.C.K. to expand the program to every street corner in Texas. The program became a massive success, raking in 2 Trillion dollars annually for the remainder of the war.

Congratulations, You have been Liberated!

However, Texas was cucked following the end of the American Civil War, when American soldiers breached the border and conquered all of Texas. In this conquest, the Military Governor was executed, and Texas became 'liberated' by the U.S. in the form of unceasing carpet bombings for a full calendar month. This killed several dozens of government officials, leaving Billy D. Donut the highest ranking official alive. He was nearly killed when a stray ballistic missile flew through his bedroom window; however, it slipped cleanly through his glazed head hole, and into his neighbor's house, killing that neighbor's entire family.

Approximately 44% of Texas was killed in the American liberation operation, lower than other Southern areas (with Louisiana experiencing a 66% slaughter and Arkansas experiencing a 68% slaughter). Every single Confederate??Combine loyalist was hanged and executed, except for Billy, whose head kept slipping through the noose due to the glaze. Eventually, the U.S. gave up and simply tied a noose around the upper portion of his toroidal head, which did not harm him but was somewhat uncomfortable. However, he quite enjoyed the public location of his hanging, and was constantly surrounded by adoring fans and people everywhere he looked, due to his historical relevance, saviorship of Texas, and general strange appearance.

Hero of Our Town

There hung Billy, in the public square, for nearly 200 years. He became a beloved living historical monument, and offered great insights about the American Civil War and rural life in Texas in the past. He was awarded an honorary Doctorate in Political Studies from the University of Texas and, coupled with his Law Degree, was considered the most prestigious scholar to ever grace Texas. During his time hanged, he also found God and Jesus Christ our savior, as a nearby Charch had weekly gospel sessions which he could overhere. He was given a bible by the priest and was eventually ordained as a Minister, hosting his own religious services, the Billy D. Donut Christian services at the site of his hanging, a place he eventually designated the Outdoors Gallows Church. He was a beloved and loved figure for all around, and passed away peacefully in his sleep on Grimsnap's Day. Upon his body was built a massive marble monument in his honor, 400x bigger than the Empire state Building, which sunk Texas into the sea and made all of the land arable and lush, Billy's final gift to the world.