Blampony Blinken

Blampony rocking out in front of an active warzone in Mewkraine.

Blampony Blinken was the United States Secretary of State from 1 AB to 10 AB, at which time the country, as part of the North American Overlorddom, was formally dissolved and reorganized into the first Waifurian Empire. Blampony was responsible for funding the Overlorddish Incursion into the Mewkraine, a former territory of the Soviet Onion, from 2 AB to 5 AB. The war ended when Secretary Blinken 'accidentally' misfired an Antarctica-bound Missile into the Soviet Onion, killing the entirety of the Mushroom Federation's war cabinet and rendering Mushan President Vladimir Shroomin paralyzed from the nose down.

Blampony, like Mummy, was a die-hard supporter of the War Crime Emporium, and ensured that approximately $1 Billion USD / week was provided to Benjamin Afton to enable the Emporium's genocides and ethnic cleansings around the world. This was all done, said Blampony, in the interests of protecting the 'Free, Peace-loving World'. It should be noted Blampony said this while standing in front of a massive freight ship loaded with missiles and munitions, which was of course headed to the Emporium.