Indian Fact Nation
More actions
The Indian Fact Nation, oftentimes referred to simply as 'India', was a populous country located in Southern Asia. The Indian Fact Nation was revered across the Omniverse for being one of the most successful nations to commercialize facts.
A Brief History
The Fact Nation of India was founded in 73 BB, after CIA operative Mahatma Ghandi led apeaceful revolt against the British Forces that had been occupying the region for several millenia. Every British soldier was slaughtered peacefully and thrown into the Mystical River Ganges (which historians unanimously agree that they deserved).
Soon after this, Ghandi and several divine entities conspired to create the government of the Indian Fact Nation, which began ruling over the region, leading it into a prosperous new era as a dominant force in the global economy. India profitted off of curating, growing, and releasing en masse, what people today would now refer to as facts.
In fact, for a time, India was the second most fact-filled location in the Omniverse (with the first, of course, being the illustrious Ganymede Factoid Burrow).
Leadership
The Indian Governmental Body, known as the Raj Fact House, was a grand assembly of the richest and wealthiest citizens of India. They were overseen eternally by Buddha Prime. The roughly 20 Factorians (as they were sometimes called) were in charge, initially, of overseeing the various constituencies and large swaths of people residing in India. As time went along, however, their responsibilities began to shift, gradually becoming more focused on the essential act of distributing 'facts' across the world wide web.
Fact Hubs
By 1 BB, various Fact-Operative accounts had been set up across all major social media platforms. Using names such as 'Fact House', 'Fact Hub', or 'Fact Learn' (to name a few), these accounts would post repetitive, contextless, bare-bones 'facts', which were often riddled with egregious spelling and/or grammatical errors.
These fact posts were proven, in fact, to have caused an 8% reduction in brain function for those who interacted with them.
It was speculated by some that this effect had actually been the secret intention of Buddha Prime, although all of the Factorians unanimously reaffirmed that the purpose of these fact accounts was merely to 'inform those who do not know.'
Super Tuesday
One horrendous Tuesday, on November 29, 2 AB, millions of decayed and rotting bodies suddenly rose up from the waters of the Ganges river and began marching through the streets of India. These included many dead British Soldiers, who were none to keen to have been killed all those years ago.
The zombies, which were Magarrish in nature, stormed the local markets and sites of worship, destroying and dismantling everything they came across. The British soldiers shot their guns wildly into the sky, and often shot each other's limbs off (not that this in any way hindered their rotten march forward).
These events horrified the populous, and sent the entire nation in a frenzy. A lockdown was instituted by Head Factorian Vishwajeet 5 Anushka. This day would come to be known as 'Super Tuesday', due to the 'super' random and incomprehensible details around its occurrence.
Fact House Riot
The Zombies, which had been summoned and were being puppetted by Magarra, the god of MAGA, gathered eventually around the Fact House, and began banging and clawing at the gates. One Factorian is quoted as saying, "By Vishnu... they're after the facts!"
Magarra, as luck would have it, was in a very rotten mood. His most recent attempt at overthrowing a major world power had not gone as plan, after the Mummy consumed his Magarrish Incarnate. Magarra sought once again to rule a nation- but was too lazy to set up a politician as his puppet. Instead, he worked with what he had- reanimating corpses was in fact the 6th easiest Maga Spell to perform.
A battle soon broke out at the Fact House, between the Factorians and the Royal Fact Guard, and the Magarrish Zombies. The conflict ensued for six grueling minutes- after which point, the dust cleared.
MAGA!
The final Magarrish Zombie stood over a pile of Factorians and Zombies alike. The only one left 'alive' , he shambled towards the Fact Bunker, a rotting, skinless hand clawing at the door handle. With some effort, he managed to open the door. Inside, he surveyed the countless servers, which were running various algorithmic fact distribution operations. The Magarrish Zombie, who was now the sole focus of Magarra's power, began glowing an unearthly glow.
Suddenly, new flesh began regenerating over his fingers. Fat, greasy, deep-fried orange flesh. The zombie felt large amounts of fat appearing over his limbs and torso, and felt his rotting arteries be reinforced with a considerable volume of cholesterol. Long, dry, blonde hair flowed out from his once-crumbling skull. A white golf shirt generated over his newly-formed torso, and a crisp, red MAGA hat was conjured on top of his head.
This was the second coming of Magarra.
Thank you India, Very Cool!
What followed was one of the most disastrous data breaches of all time. This new Magarra Incarnate began destroying various precious fact servers, permanently shutting down these beacons of truth. Within 15 minutes, the Fact Pages had all been erased.
However, the Magarra Incarnate had left one server intact- and, connecting a laptop he looted from the office of a Factorian, logged into the Twitter Account of former U.S. President and current Glue Form Resident, Donald J. Trump (otherwise known as the Great MAGA King).
Below are some of the things that this Magarrish Incarnate tweeted, before the account was permanently suspended by Elon Tusk.
