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Vong

From The Rick Hernia Omniverse Wiki
Revision as of 08:34, 25 May 2023 by w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>SlabCorp Quality Review II
Lord Vong and his Familiar, a Calypsid Butterfly.

Lord Vong, Lunar Patron, was a military official and spiritual guru hailing from the mountain kingdom of Tibet.

Early Life

Vong was born in Lhasa to a human mother, Eni, on April 23, 200 BB. He had no father; nine months before his birth, Eni experienced a 'trascendental experience' while gazing at the full moon; she fell asleep in a field of moonflowers, and when she awoke, she was pregnant. Eni would give birth to Vong at the town apothocary. After Vong's birth, she was banished from Lhasa for giving birth to a 'stranger's child'; the townsfolk did not believe she had truly been impregnated by Earth's Moon. Eni ran off into the mountains, carrying only a small blanket and a week's rations.

As Eni clambered further up the Tibetan mountain range, a harsh snowstorm descended on the land. She cradled her newborn child in her arms, shielding him from the elements. She swaddled him in her blanket as the torrential wind turned to ice.




Vong
AliasesLord Vong King of the Holy Moon
RelativesEni (Mother)

Earth's Moon (Father)

Garrymede (Distant Cousin)
AffiliationKingdom of Tibet
OccupationEnlightened Despot
Biographical information
Date of birth4/23/200 BB
Place of birthLhasa, Tibet
Date of death5/22/178 BB
Place of deathEarth's Moon
Physical description
SpeciesDemihuman
GenderMale
Height6'1
Weight201 lbs.
Eye colorwhite
Appearances

A Divine Blessing

Eni prayed to the Gods to save her son from this wretched storm. She buried her face in the snow beneath her, tears melting into the ground. Suddenly, the storm let up. Silence fell over the mountain range. In disbelief, Eni looked up, and found herself in a small, lush forest grove. Grapevines grew across the many trees of this orchard; and the sun shone brightly on her face. On all sides, Eni was surrounded by towering mountain walls; she was in a long-dormant volcanic crater, although where, she did not know.

"Welcome, young one." Came a voice from behind. A warm, shimmering figure approached. This was Ed Wool, God of heat and fire, and he had rescued Eni and Vong from the terrible storm in the mountains. This was his special Grand Orchard; a retreat from the harsh weather of the Tibetan plateau. Ed Wool explained that he owed the Moon a great debt, although he would not elaborate what that debt was. He promised to help Eni to raise Vong in the Grand Orchard, and ensured that the boy would grow up to harness his special connection with The Moon.

Training

As Vong grew older, he became very strong indeed. Vong, as a young man, recieved special training from Ed Wool in the Grand Orchard. Ed had a special celestial connection with Venus, the innermost non-egg planet. This knowledge helped him to instruct Vong on connecting with his own respective celestial body; the Legumish energies which resided naturally in the Omniverse can be saddled, connected, wired together, by those wise enough to harness them. Ed blessed Vong with a specialized, starmetal katana, the first of its kind. These katanas would go on to be the common weapon of MTO melee fighters.

Ed Wool.

Vong trained with the power of Venus in the day (which was rather weak, and near impossible to connect to when Venus was below the horizon) and immersed himself in the grandiosity of Earth's Moon at night. Soon enough, he was a full-grown adult, capable of wielding great celestial energies. Eni, now an elderly woman, looked on as her son bested Ed Wool time and time again in magical combat. She felt her heart brimming with excitement and pride at her son's success. How strong he had grown up to be.

A Blessing with Wings

On Vong's 18th birthday, he experienced a vision late at night while talking to the moon. His father, the Moon, blessed him with the ability to conjur a familiar; a swift, agile blue Calypsid Butterfly whose wings were sharp as a razor and cold as space. This Familiar became Vong's companion; and through it, he conferred with his father's celestial essence often.

Duty Calls

It was not long before it became time for Vong leave the Grand Orchard, at the suggestion of Ed Wool. Ed explained to Vong the ongoing invasion of Earth, and the Combine Empire's habit of turning civilized planets into giant resource repositories. Ed had taught Vong all he knew, and now, the young man was ready to defend his homeworld and its moon. At this point, the war had raged on for all of Vong's life; for twenty-two years, the Earth had been besieged from extradimensional invaders. Vong knew his powers far outmatched any other human alive at the time; and he felt within him a deep duty to save the Solar System. He left his mother with a warm embrace, and was quickly on his way to the Gobi Desert, where a fierce ground battle had raged for months.

The War in the Gobi

China was losing badly to the Combine Infantry in the Gobi Desert. This was largely thanks to the relentless orbital bombardments of the vicious Admiral Amonger, who regarded human life as 'suspiciously purposeless'. The Chinese military, try as they might, were no match for the Combine tanks, striders, and bombings which had rocked the desert for a quarter of a year. That is, until Vong arrived on the battlefield. Late at night, as shelling still rocked the freezing arid landscape, Vong stepped out onto the battlefield, his familiar on his shoulder. He raised his arms to the sky, parting the dusty clouds above. The full moon shone like a spotlight onto the battlefield, and Vong drew from his belt his starmetal Katana. The Chinese troops rallied behind him; "Onward!" Vong declared, "to victory!'

Vong, engulfed now in a glowing lunar aura, ran into the Combine infrantry, swinging his blade around in circles. His familiar darted between the heads of Combine Overwatch soldiers, cutting their throats and letting them bleed out on the cold desert sand. Vong chopped through the legs of Striders like butter, and within the hour, the Combine infantry had been reduced to a pile of motionless flesh.

Wassup Beijing?

Combined Rage

The Asian Combine Advisors were outraged at this sudden and swift defeat. They watched on in disbelief as Vong advanced further into the Chinese heartland, dispatching Combine legion after Combine legion. The orbital bombardments became useless; Vong struck only at night, when the moon shone, and the surface was too dark to spot Vong and his legions until it was too late. As Vong approached Combine-occupied Beijing, the Combine was now in full retreat in Asia. Vong's troops suffered single-digit losses in each battle they fought, while the Combine was absolutely hemorraging soldiers. Effectively, Vong was a one-man killing machine, trained by a God, fathered by a celestial body, and stronger than any mortal man could ever dream of.

Incursion of Beijing

Within a matter of days, Vong's troops had arrived at the gates of the fortified city of Beijing. Combine gunships swooped overhead, striders trained their guns on the soldiers, and a hush fell over the city. But nobody fired. The Overwatch were motionless as Vong and his armies walked straight through the gates of Beijing. Vong's familiar fluttered around the troops, ready to quell any ambush or sniper that might arise. But no such attack ever came. Vong's men were mystified, but he showed no fear. He walked straight into the city's central palace doors, and found an empty throne room awaiting him.

Suddenly, out from one of the doorways, floated a lone Combine Advisor, flanked by two Overwatch soldiers. One of the soldiers stepped forward.

"We would like to negotiate peace," he said through his mechanized facemask. Vong cocked his head at him.

"Peace?" Vong asked, wrapping his fingers around his starmetal katana.

"Yes," the footsoldier continued, "If you surrender now, we'll leave this city forever. We will leave you to your own devices."

"There is no honor in surrender," Vong stated, after a moment; continuing, "kill them all."

Vong lunged at the Combine Advisor, thrusting his Katana into the Advisor's side. He pulled it down, slicing a massive wound into the pale flesh of the creature. This left a massive gash on the Advisor's side, green blood pouring out an onto the palace floor. Two of Vong's men engaged the Combine footsoldiers, quickly disposing of them with their own katanas. Vong advanced into the door the Advisor had entered from; he was soon met with a room full of Advisors, all of whom were quickly dealt with. Vong had quickly dispatched the entire occupying force of Beijing. He draped Chinese banners from the largest balconies of the palace, and called out to the remaining Combine troops; "Leave this place at once, or die!"

War Hero