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G-Man and Goodman, Partners at Law

From The Rick Hernia Omniverse Wiki
Revision as of 13:39, 2 June 2022 by w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>Fabafaba32
Goodman and G-Man, Partners at Law
Keith Cumshoes' pitiful condition after slipping in the J.F. Sweets Facility.

G-Man and Goodman, Partners at Law

G-Man and Goodman was an alleged "Law Firm" operating from 3 A.B. to 40 A.B.. Two individuals, Saul Goodman and G-Man, opened the practice after reducing the latter's federal prison sentence by roughly 12,998 years. The two operated at first from a cliffside national park in eastern Maine, but moved their practice to Waifuria Prime once construction was completed on the space station.

High-profile Clients

The law firm quickly gained a reputation for being the type of law firm that guilty people hired, but also for being able to secure egregious and unfathomable amounts of wealth for their clients. G-Man and Saul claimed this was because they were "Really good lawyers." During the firm's entire time active, the two individuals refused to hire anyone other than one woman, Cecily Morbius, with Saul claiming it had "nothing to do with her badass name".

Below is a table of the aforementioned clients, as well as the cases and a brief description of each.

G&G CASE SUMMARIES
Client Case Description Verdict
John F. Brian Brian v. Portland Oregon Mr. Brian sued the city of Portland Oregon for $33 Million USD in psychological damages due to losing 23 family members in the 'Hellification' of the area. Since no living beings resided in Portland Oregon, the defendant was a charred deer femur. Mr. Brian was awarded $17 USD and the femur agreed to supplement the additional $32,999,983 dollars within the next five years.
Perry Jacksonville Florida V. Wasps Perry sought to secure $15 USD in damages due to the "violent and aggressive behavior" of wasps and bees across the country. Perry was awarded $15 USD from the Beekeepers Association of Waifuria.
Keith Cumshoes Cumshoes V. Waifuria Keith Cumshoes sought to "become Overlord" of Waifuria for a brief period after the Glue Factory Incident. He cited "irrevocable differences" with NOT being the Overlord. Mr. Cumshoes was awarded $200 Million USD and an honorary visit with Joe Biden, the latter of which he declined. He did not become Overlord.
Keith Cumshoes Cumshoes V. J.F. Sweets After tripping and falling over a cord left out in a J.F. Sweets facility near Albuquerque, New Mexico, Keith Cumshoes was admitted to a hospital and treated for severe spinal injuries. He sued J.F. Sweets for 14 Trillion USD. Goodman was able to secure Cumshoes roughly 400 Trillion USD, as well as a lifetime supply of J.F. Sweets' promotional 'Black Hole' Flavor of Ice Cream.
G-Man Alpha G-Man Alpha V. Joe Biden G-Man Alpha, around the time of public shock at the Combine Visit Incident, took the opportunity to build a massive lawsuit against the Overlord of North America. He sued on every possible charge, and worked actively with G-Man and Saul to create the most 'Destructive possible lawsuit'. Ultimately, they ended up suing Joe Biden for roughly 403 Quadrillion USD. He didn't have the money, so he offered them Waifuria Prime instead. G-Man, G-Man Alpha, and Saul Goodman became joint owners of Waifuria Prime.

Waifuria Prime Ownership

After the case of 'G-Man Alpha V. Joe Biden' was settled in 22 A.B., the three decided they would split ownership of Waifuria Prime equally, with each individual gaining a third of the satellite. After the acquisition, they all began aggressively monetizing and selling off parcels of the satellite to corporations and individuals (but never governmental entities). Biden's Governor of Waifuria Prime, Bryan Crayon IV, was 'sent on a trip to Belize', and Saul became the de facto governor of Waifuria Prime (but ceded his territory to the two G-Men in exchange for the position).

Disbandment of the Firm and Break-up

In 40 A.B., G-Man was called away from Waifuria Prime due to an 'unforeseen consequence'. While he was away, Saul sent him a heartfelt letter, confessing his deep feelings of love and attraction towards the G-Man, but said that he could never be with him, explaining that what happened to 6 was a fate he didn't want to meet. When G-Man returned, Saul had disbanded the firm, shredded all important documents, and had left G-Man a small heart-shaped pendant with an image of the two kissing, with the caption, 'S'all Good, G-Man'. G-Man was understandably heartbroken, and was very irritable and moody for the next ten thousand years.