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The Wedding

From The Rick Hernia Omniverse Wiki
Revision as of 02:02, 14 April 2025 by w:c:the-rick-hernia-omniverse>SlabCorp Quality Review II
The Wedding

The Wedding was a supremely rotted, horrendously contrived event that occurred in 999,989 AB on Christmas Day, 10 years before the Final Moment. The event marked the culmination of billions of years of intergalactic tensions resolving in one grand and glorious, mask-off technofascist escapade, where Neo-Aeternian God Emperor Donald J. Trump, at the behest of Corporatus, the Capitalism Incarnate, agreed to meet with rival Omniversal Superpower & Auberginish Essencehold Joe Biden for a special summit at the Bidenkeep to discuss the ongoing Great META War 3, and specifically Neo-Aeternia's longstanding policy of neutrality in the conflict. This was the first meeting of the two men since the Glue Factory Incident, nearly one million years prior. When they met, they shook hands and shared a laugh like old friends, before turning and posing to the cameras.

"It's been a heck of a long time, Jack," Mummy was quoted as saying, "It's great to see you, pal."

"Such a beautiful venue," the MAGA King was alleged to have replied, "So beautiful in terms of gold and purple."

A grand GALA (Gay And Lame Attraction) was held in honour of the Neo-Aeternian Delegation's arrival, even as explosions rocked the skies overhead. This GALA was emceed by Ellis, who played Marimba. Grand festivities were had and luxurious Berrandese Slave-Labor wines were produced, shared among the Americans and Enclave alike. Great discussion was had, and it was determined through unanimous consensus that the two groups, once opposed to devoutly to one another, had much more in common than was previously determined. In order to guarantee the stability of the Omniversal economic system, and protection from the radical bloodthirsty terrorism of Rick Hernia & the Worlds Without Boundaries organization, the two governments determined an alliance should be made. But not just any alliance, no- this was a union, a holy matrimonous declaration of commitment. And Mike Pence be damned, a great and glorious detail was finally revealed; the most artfully concealed thread of Omniversal Fate of All; that these two men, once presented as wholly oppositional to each other, were in fact one in the very same; brainrotted together, dementia-ridden together, and leading the largest governments remaining Omniversewide, were Soul Tethered. And so a marriage event was held, and Joseph R. Biden, The Mummy, was married to Donald J. Trump, the Maga King, and upon their first kiss, a purple shadow cast over the ballroom, and the fate of the Omniverse grew darker.

For the remainder of the war, Neo-Aeternia provided military support to the Enclave; that is, until the collapse of Neo-Aeternia, at which point Donald Trump and the Magarrian Gard were taken into Enclavish protection on Exegar and began contributing their individual powernesses to the Rotten, Mummonic cause.