Motley Sue

Motley Sue

Motley Sue (Formerly Susan R. Hogsburry) was a Bear X Soul Fragment who was released from the communal conscience upon the smiting of the Soullean Cyber Bear at the hands of the Hulphlocke Impotum.

Susan was originally consumed in a Soullean fashion in the fallout of the Grand Luminous Deer Incident, in which she was eaten by Bear X (then Jimothy). She existed as part of Bear X for unknown years until her expulsion.

Susan is Not the Impostor

When she was ejected, along with millions of other souls, Susan was shot out into Omniversal Dimensionspace and found herself at the Zockthrone of Lord Bradley Molp, King of Seventh Dimension. lord Bradley Molp, frightened by the simplicity of the Soullean life form before him, blasted Susan with a blast of Hemorriga Oil, but he did not anticipate the effect this would have on her subdimensional soul.

Susan Motley

Susan became Motley. Scale-like Skin formed around her weathered Soulleanity and her fingers contorted to the Seventh Kind. Susan ascended into a Seventh Dimensional and immediately consumed Lord Bradley Molp, absorbing his Quontossince into herself. Now, Motley Sue was no longer Soullean.

Motley Sue Bagel Factory

Motley Sue, now more powerful than Bear X ever was, and one singular conscience, at that, chose to create her wicked vile dreams with her newfound powers. She opened a Bagel Factory in the upper Rolmstead of lord Bradley, whose Mixonwives were rather displeasured at the sesame smells.

Motley Sue consumed the Mixonwives and ordered their Soullean forms to operate the Bagel Machinery. This was the first omniversal instance of Soullean Slavery however Bear X is undefinable and the seventh dimension has no flow of time, so we cannot estimate when this happened as it was a singularity.

Motley Sue Bagel Disapproval

The Seventh Dimensionals became disgruntled at the three dimensional odors being wafted across the micro plane by Motley Sue. They were so angry in fact that the Mayor of Collection 12 gopstomped up the bibblestairs to see Motley Sue, and engaged her in a Spacewar. He threw puny fifth dimensionals at her but they passed through her Motley Skin. Motley Sue, enraged at this action, consumed the Mayor and locked the Sobdoors, and began to craft a wicked Object.

Motley Sue Bagel Rue

Motley Sue had a rotten plan. Using the sub shattered Fourth dimension as an expansive mixing bowl, Susan began preparing a Gigabagel, larger than the three dimensional Andromeda Galaxy, with which she aimed to slaughter all citizens of the Seventh Dimension for their rotten behavior. Unfortunately Susan failed to take into account the rotten end of the fourth dimension, and several Impossibility Drives were implemented within the Gigabagel’s Vile crust.

Implementation

Motley Sue assembled a Motley Crew of Bagel Beasts, who stood ready for action atop the Gigabagel. She transported them into the Seventh Dimension, where the Bagel immediately filled the entire micro plane and suffocated and killed everybody, except for Motley Sue and her Motley Crew (no relation to the band, Motley Crue)

Susan bagel trial

Susan was now in much trouble with both Ig Serroid and Hulphlocke Impotum (despite his existing in an instance before her destruction). Ig Serroid began sending Mages of Time to the Bagelified Seventh Dimension, but were unable to penetrate the harsh Sesame Exterior. Hulphlocke Impotum convened a Grand Justice Orderium of the T.O.A.S.T, from which a resounding 1-0 vote declared Motley Sue an enemy of the entire Omniverse. This, of course, changed nothing.

Motley Sue was now trapped in the Bagel Realm, in the hole in the middle of the bagel with her Bagelbeasts. She grew bored and tired. Susan began eating the Bagelbeasts.

Unforeseen Collapse

Susan failed to account for the quantum structure of the seventh dimension, and the impact of filling 95% of its space with whole wheat bread product. Within the highly pressurized innards of the bagel, stars began forming, and now the entire bagel had heated up to such intense temperatures it began to glow. This was not helped in the least by the Improbability Drives, which began summoning Cosmic Horrors within the bagel who were promptly crushed into neutron stars.

This commotion alarmed Susan, but it was too late, for the GigaBagel, confined to too little space for so much energy, began to Supernova. Motley Sue was trapped within her own creation. This should have been the end of Motley Sue. However, if I told you that, it would not be true.

Just as the supernova began, and a fiery nebula reached out to consume her Quontossonce, Susan felt an odd breeze run across her Soullous Hair. The supernova froze, a motionless painting against the fractured Gigabagel. A voice echoed out across the void…

“Time, Motley Susan? Is it really that time again?”