The Mining Ship "Red Dwarf"

"Man I'm finna whip this ho"

- some fucking 14 year old white boy upon seeing the Red Dwarf.

Summary

The mining ship named "Red Dwarf", is a massive, city-sized spaceship owned and maintained by the Jupiter Mining Company (or JMC). The Red Dwarf was designed to accommodate 11,169 crew members consisting of engineers, doctors, chefs, pilots and various other professions.

However, on their voyage to Saturn's moon "Titan" the entirety of the crew went missing and have never been heard of since. No distress signal was ever received either.

Early Years

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A photo of the mining ship's front.

The JMC Red Dwarf is an enormous mining craft, measuring ten kilometers in length and is one of the oldest and largest vessels in commission for the Jupiter Mining Corporation, crewed by the M.T.O Space Pilots and commanded by Captain Adolf Hitler II. The ship was designed to be far longer and larger but this design was changed after the JMC made considerable cutbacks due to financial problems at the time. At the ship's front is the Front Ramscoop that collects traces of hydrogen and helium in space.

The Engine Core powers the ship, and the Ramscoop would allow the ship to theoretically keep running forever with an endless source of fuel. There is also a large number of solar panels and battery back-ups but due to the massive drain of power these could only maintain the ship for a few weeks without the main engines.

Ship Locations

The ship computer, "Xerxes" monitors most of the ship through his "Eye of Sauron" Field
Elevators provide transport across the thousands of decks. For longer journeys, there are also the Xpress Lifts and the bullet train system (however these transportation methods are known for malfunctioning and leading to gruesome incidents. See "The Human Bologna" incident)

Corridors (There are a total of 7,000 corridors aboard the ship, most leading to dead ends and doors that go nowhere or loop around in a non-Euclid fashion).
Portholes
Airlocks (These are no longer in use due to a member of the crew losing his spinal cord in an accident)
Drive Rooms
Captain's Office
White Corridor 159 (This corridor does not seem to abide by the laws of time and physics)
Sleeping quarters
Science Room (The room contained, upon discovery a dissected baboon and orangutan that had been rotting for over five years)
Medical Unit containing the Medi-Bot
Sperm Bank (Linked to "The Cumsta$h"
Dental practice
Shuttle bays
Customs
Locker Room
2,143 restrooms and Toilets with revolving toilets and toilet paper
Showers and bathrooms
Penthouse Suite
Officer's Club
Floor 341
Disco
A Deck
B Deck
C Deck
D Deck
G Deck
M Deck
Z Deck
Parrots Bar
Karaoke Bar
Games Room
Gymnasium
Caligula Suite
Mess Hall
Shopping Mall
Electoral debate room
Cinema
Botanical gardens
Observation Dome
Observation room
Stasis Chambers
Floor 14
Floor 16
Hologram Simulation Suite on Floor 592
Penis Inspection Room
Mineral geologists room
Photo processing
Solar panels
Front Ramscoop
Engine Core
Diesel Decks
Water Tank on G Deck (See "The Elisa Lam Incident")
Docking Foot
Diving Bells
Cargo bays (these take up most of the 2500+ decks of the ship)
Mineral ore storage bay
Bay 47, Quarantine
JMC Red Dwarf Customs
Two asteroids embedded in the underside of the ship
Research labs on Z Deck
Supply Pipe 28
Sewers
Waste Disposal
The Tank, the classified 400-inmate prison on restricted Floor 13
The Hole, a cell for solitary-confinement in The Tank