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== Dark MAGA == | == Dark MAGA == | ||
Dark MAGA was a cannibalistic cult of supporters of [[Donald Trump (Great MAGA King)|The Great MAGA King]]. They were avid followers of [[G-Anon]], but were far more extreme than the average G-Anon supporter. Dark MAGA believers called themselves 'patriots', and frequently had large orgies in the name of the MAGA King. | Dark MAGA was a cannibalistic cult of supporters of [[Donald Trump (Great MAGA King)|The Great MAGA King]], and later an undead liberation force. They were avid followers of [[G-Anon]], but were far more extreme than the average G-Anon supporter. Dark MAGA believers called themselves 'patriots', and frequently had large orgies in the name of the MAGA King. | ||
=== Inception === | === Inception === | ||
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In 10 A.B, [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)|Joe Biden]] became angry with an aide and complained that [[Donald Trump (Great MAGA King)|the Great MAGA King]] was "being too loud in [his] tummy". The Aide rushed the newly-crowned Emperor to a hospital. Biden reportedly experienced several strokes after this. He entered a catatonic state where his eyes glazed over with inky black residue and his mouth began emitting supersonic frequencies. | In 10 A.B, [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)|Joe Biden]] became angry with an aide and complained that [[Donald Trump (Great MAGA King)|the Great MAGA King]] was "being too loud in [his] tummy". The Aide rushed the newly-crowned Emperor to a hospital. Biden reportedly experienced several strokes after this. He entered a catatonic state where his eyes glazed over with inky black residue and his mouth began emitting supersonic frequencies. | ||
Biden began emitting a low, gutteral scream, and a humanoid figure began emerging from his [[Glue Form]] torso. It was the spirit of the MAGA King, still alive within the confines of [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)|the Mummy]]. The MAGA King reportedly sent out a psychic [[The Force|Force]] Mindspell to his supporters and Dark MAGA, with one simple message- "Covfefe". | Biden began emitting a low, gutteral scream, and a humanoid figure began emerging from his [[Glue Form]] torso. It was the spirit of the MAGA King, still alive within the confines of [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)|the Mummy]]. The MAGA King reportedly sent out a psychic [[The Force|Force]] Mindspell to his supporters and Dark MAGA, with one simple message- "Covfefe". Only true Dark MAGA patriots knew the meaning of this phrase, and the translation was unfortunately lost forever due to... well, I'm really not at liberty to say. | ||
=== Dark MAGA Apocalypse === | === Dark MAGA Apocalypse === | ||
Every Dark MAGA cultist immediately froze in place and exhibited the same black glossy eyes. Dark MAGA cultists of years pasts rose from the dead, and began advancing on the Bass Pro Shop Pyramid. | Every Dark MAGA cultist immediately froze in place and exhibited the same black glossy eyes and pained expression as [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)|Joe Biden]]. Dark MAGA cultists of years pasts rose from the dead, and began advancing on the [[Bass Pro Shop Pyramid]]. Hordes of these undead Dark MAGA cultists, kept alive with accursed [[Pangea|Pangean]] spells of olde, began tearing through the [[Waifurian Empire|Waifurian Imperial]] guard. Among them were undead humans, undead giants, and an unnamed deceased ancestor of [[President Floordeck]], which towered above the [[Bass Pro Shop Pyramid]] at nearly 2 kilometers tall. | ||
A massive, several months-long conflict ensued. Thousands of Waifurian troops lost their lives defending the [[Bass Pro Shop Pyramid]]. Biden remained in a lifeless, disfigured state during this time, with the [[Donald Trump (Great MAGA King)|MAGA King]]'s Glue Form slowly becoming more and more defined in the amorphous flesh of [[Joe Biden (Disambigaution)|the Mummy]]. | |||
=== Summoning of the Grand Nihilanth === | |||
Dark MAGA cultists, both alive and undead, stormed the [[Bass Pro Shop Pyramid]], performing daily human sacrifices of Waifurian Guards and waving banners and touting machine weaponry. They entered the premises and began spilling blood on the foyer floor. They drew a massive G (thought to have represented [[G-Anon]]) | |||
Revision as of 12:58, 28 June 2022

Dark MAGA
Dark MAGA was a cannibalistic cult of supporters of The Great MAGA King, and later an undead liberation force. They were avid followers of G-Anon, but were far more extreme than the average G-Anon supporter. Dark MAGA believers called themselves 'patriots', and frequently had large orgies in the name of the MAGA King.
Inception
Dark MAGA is thought to have originated as a fringe sect of Pangean cultists, who worshipped the Great MAGA King. They built golden statues of him, covered themselves in tattoos of his face, and performed Force rituals in his honor.
Lights Off
In 5 B.B, During the Great MAGA King's presidential campaign, he uttered the phrase, "turn those lights off, turn them off!" This phrase was hijacked by Dark MAGA cultists and became the unofficial motto of Dark MAGA. When the MAGA King dissapeared after the Glue Factory Incident, Dark MAGA began using the slogan 'Democracy Dies in Darkness' as a sinister threat to the United States Government (they believed Joe Biden had murdered the MAGA King). They were partially correct.
Human Sacrifice
Dark MAGA associates held an annual festival at the ruins of the United States Capitol Building, (destroyed in the Capitol Riot) each January 6th. On this very special day, Dark MAGA cultists would all be required to fill out a ballot form denoting which of their fellow Dark MAGA members they thought was a 'Crooked'. Whoever received the most votes would be named that year's 'Crooked' Effigy and slowly skinned and eaten alive on the crumbling Capitol steps. The corpse would be draped in the American flag and shot out of a cannon into the Atlantic Ocean.
Dark MAGA Mindspell
In 10 A.B, Joe Biden became angry with an aide and complained that the Great MAGA King was "being too loud in [his] tummy". The Aide rushed the newly-crowned Emperor to a hospital. Biden reportedly experienced several strokes after this. He entered a catatonic state where his eyes glazed over with inky black residue and his mouth began emitting supersonic frequencies.
Biden began emitting a low, gutteral scream, and a humanoid figure began emerging from his Glue Form torso. It was the spirit of the MAGA King, still alive within the confines of the Mummy. The MAGA King reportedly sent out a psychic Force Mindspell to his supporters and Dark MAGA, with one simple message- "Covfefe". Only true Dark MAGA patriots knew the meaning of this phrase, and the translation was unfortunately lost forever due to... well, I'm really not at liberty to say.
Dark MAGA Apocalypse
Every Dark MAGA cultist immediately froze in place and exhibited the same black glossy eyes and pained expression as Joe Biden. Dark MAGA cultists of years pasts rose from the dead, and began advancing on the Bass Pro Shop Pyramid. Hordes of these undead Dark MAGA cultists, kept alive with accursed Pangean spells of olde, began tearing through the Waifurian Imperial guard. Among them were undead humans, undead giants, and an unnamed deceased ancestor of President Floordeck, which towered above the Bass Pro Shop Pyramid at nearly 2 kilometers tall.
A massive, several months-long conflict ensued. Thousands of Waifurian troops lost their lives defending the Bass Pro Shop Pyramid. Biden remained in a lifeless, disfigured state during this time, with the MAGA King's Glue Form slowly becoming more and more defined in the amorphous flesh of the Mummy.
Summoning of the Grand Nihilanth
Dark MAGA cultists, both alive and undead, stormed the Bass Pro Shop Pyramid, performing daily human sacrifices of Waifurian Guards and waving banners and touting machine weaponry. They entered the premises and began spilling blood on the foyer floor. They drew a massive G (thought to have represented G-Anon)